Monday Funday

“Sunny days wouldn’t be special if it wasn’t for rain, joy wouldn’t feel so good if it wasn’t for pain.”

Those eloquent words were spoken by gangster rapper 50 Cent back in 2003. Now while we at Speak Media wouldn’t claim to have much in common with a man who boasts that he’s been shot nine times and stabbed twice, we do think this lyric perfectly encapsulates the necessity of a Monday. If it wasn’t for Monday, Saturday wouldn’t be so special.

So while you scroll through the weekend’s tweets, catch up on Vice’s hangover news and anxiously wait for the first of Friday night’s contactless payments to leave your account; enjoy this roundup of all the things that made us laugh this week.

Racism needs your help

How do you tackle a problem like everyday racism, while fending off the usual ‘shoulder-shrugging’ response from people who should know better? Kiwi director Taika Waititi, who fronts this video campaign by the New Zealand Human Rights Commission, takes on the challenge with immense irony, deadpan delivery, and a side-splittingly funny script. For the good of humanity – and LoL-ers everywhere – let’s hope this one goes viral.

Zinging into space

The mid twentieth century was dominated by the Space Race. It was an exciting but equally scary period of history, as two global superpowers fiercely competed for control of the galaxy.

The race came to its climax in 1969. Households across the globe tuned in to watch Neil Armstrong venture where no human had before.

In a century defining moment, the American astronaut stepped off the Apollo 11 and planted the stars and stripes firmly into the ground of the moon. On that evening the world changed forever. The human race began to dream. What could mankind discover in the next fifty years? A planet inhabitable for humans? Life on mars?

Almost 50 years after that monumental event, KFC have announced that they will be sending the Chicken Zinger burger into space.

Was this quite what President Nixon had in mind when he battled Soviet leader Leonid Brezhnev for galactic domination? Probably not. Does this somewhat undermine humankind’s greatest ever achievement? Very possibly. Has it led to an engaging, amusing piece of content? Absolutely.

Undeniably intriguing, but patently pointless invention

The history of the beard is a long and complicated one. First modelled by Adam at the dawn of time when The Garden of Eden branch of Boots ran out of razors, the common beard has taken many forms throughout the century.

In 2017 the beard has very much become synonymous with the hipster. It’s part of their DNA, in their genealogy. It’s as vital to the survival of the modern hipster man as his fixie bike or his insatiable thirst for pale ale.

It’s with this in mind that spicy sauce manufacturers Tabasco, along with lifestyle brand Urbanology, have designed the ‘BBQ beard-pinny.’ A waterproof cover to keep that trendy facial hair from getting soaked this summer.

The invention does prompt a few questions. Like why would you have a barbeque in the rain? And doesn’t it get in the way when you’re devouring a hotdog?

In fact a more effective use might be to protect beards from food and drink spillages, to avoid hirsute hipsters looking like Roald Dahl’s Twits.